


Self-esteem issues

by LisaFQueen



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Dancing Steve Rogers, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, Self-Esteem Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-07
Updated: 2019-06-07
Packaged: 2020-04-12 11:41:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19131319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LisaFQueen/pseuds/LisaFQueen
Summary: Bucky finds Steve moping about something and is bound to find out what it is.





	Self-esteem issues

**Author's Note:**

> This is one square of my Stucky Bingo! Yey 😊

Bucky sighed as he walked closer to Steve. Even with his back turned to him, Bucky could see he was sulking.

Steve nudged his eyes to the right, looking at the floor. Then back to his hands. _Of course  Bucky has to stick his nose in it._

Both men were quiet, the tension thick in the air. Bucky knew Steve had heard him, but refused to turn around.

In one smooth movement Bucky took off his cap and placed it between his fingers in front of his crotch, politely.

He sighed again, hoping Steve would give him some attention.

Steve cast his eyes forward, staring at the beige wall. He wished Bucky would get the hint and leave.

Hesitantly Bucky took another step towards Steve, hoping he wasn't making Steve's mood worse.

But he was.

Steve's mouth twitched in annoyance.

Bucky noticed and then placed his hat on Steve, who almost jumped at the touch.

"Go away."

So Bucky sat himself next to Steve on the concrete, legs danlging off the buidling.

"Hey punk." Bucky smiled genuinely to the side, trying to reach Steve's eyes.

But Steve refused to look at his friend, instead looking at the wall. It was so boring, that wall. Yet comforting, plain. Unlike his thoughts.

Bucky reached in his pocket and lit up a cig, offering Steve one. Steve didn't even flinch.

"C'mon, man. I'm here for you."  
Cigarette dangling between his lips, Bucky nodged his head at Steve's. Steve saw it in the corner of his eye.

"Talk to me." Bucky encouraged, lighting the white stick.

Angrily Steve picked the cap off his head, shoving it against Bucky's chest.

"Take your damn stupid hat and leave!"

It stung, but Bucky knew he did this on purpose.  
Steve's face was hard and stern, very pissed off.

Bucky took a drag and then his hat, placing it back on it's rightful place.

He softened his voice and face, and then started to talk.

"Steve. Hey, c'mon. Whatever's wrong, you can tell me. I'm not going to judge you or anything."

Bucky placed a hand on Steve's shoulder, fingers curling around the soft flesh and rough fabric.  
His thumb moved up and down, wanting to soothe Steve.

Steve's face had softened a little too, now just seeming hurt.

"You won't understand. " His voice cracked and so did Bucky's heart.

He tilted his head upward and blew out a large amount of smoke. It was to calm himself down. It was hard for him to see Steve like this, hurting.

"I can try. I'll always try."

The two had a sincere moment of friendship, eyes locked on each other.

"Thanks, Buck."

Blue eyes bore into his and Bucky let his hand slide down, rubbing Steve's back. He saw Steve close his eyes for a moment, before opening up. Or at least a little, but Bucky would work with it.

"I'm not like you, Bucky. Girls don't like me or dance with me."

He trailed off, staring away from Bucky's face.

Bucky's face showed remorse and something softer, something sweet.  
He didn't get why girls didn't wanna dance with Steve. He was so smart and fun and fucking stubborn, but that was just what made Steve _Steve_.

"They don't know what they're missin', pal."  
Bucky patted Steve's back, but Steve just huffed.

"Yeah they do. I can't dance. I can't go to the army. Can't even fucking breathe properly."

Steve looked down at his arms in earnest. His brows were furrowed and it seemed hard for him to put into words.  
Nervously fidgeting with his hands, Steve opened his mouth a few times but nothing came out but a few stutters.

Bucky had had enough and shook Steve's shoulders.

"Stop that! Those girls are stupid, anyway. Steve, - "  
The boy in question raised a hand, gesturing Bucky to stop.

"It's fine. You don't have to lie to me. Even if it is to make me feel better."

"I wouldn't lie to you, even to make you feel better. I would make you laugh."  
Bucky squeezed his shoudler and Steve shrugged.  
 _Damn, he must be really hurt from whatever happened today._

“Not laughin' am I?”

Bucky stilled for a moment, then got up and tried to get Steve up as well. He threw away the cigarette.

"No, I'd rather stay here. Where no one can reject me."

Steve could be so dramatic at times!

"Oh quit the bull and get off your skinny ass!" Bucky laughed, pulling Steve up by the arm.

When they were both standing on their feet, Steve sighed so deeply Bucky thought he was asked to do the most boring task in the world.

He grinned and ruffled the blond hair, soft in his hands. Steve relaxed a little at the touch, and to his surprise he felt a small smile creeping up his face.

"See? Way better. Now, follow me." Bucky sighed in relief and got walking.  
  
  
  


"No!"

"C'mon! Sarah won't be home for hours and besides no one knows!"

Steve grumpliy eyed his best friend, his Bucky, who always knew how to cheer him up somehow. But _this,_  this was just outrageous.

"Bucky, for God's sake!"

"Why not?" Bucky whined, taking Steve's waist in his hand. Steve struggled to get it off, but before he knew it, he and Bucky were dancing, _slowing_  for that matter, to their favorite tunes.

"What else is bothering you?"

Steve set one foot forward, stepping on Bucky's.

"The fact that I can't fucking dance! See! I can't, Buck. I'm a mess."

Bucky didn't mind the not-so-good-dancing at all, but Steve got all worked up about it.

"Listen, step on my shoes."

This got an eyeraise from Steve.

"Just do it. Stand on my feet."

Steve obliged, eyeing Bucky suspiciously. Now they were very close and Bucky had to reposition his right hand from Steve's shoulder to his waist, so Steve wouldn't fall back.

It was an awkward angle. It took a lot of energy for Steve to keep his right hand outstretched and away from their torso's, as well as balancing his neck so he wouldn't be too close to Bucky's face.

"This doesn't work for me." Steve complained.

"How 'bout this?"

Bucky moved his left hand to his neck, letting Steve's hand rest there. His own dropped down to the other side of Steve's waist.

"Weird." Steve commented.  
Bucky rolled his eyes and made sure Steve had seen it.

"Shut up and talk."

Steve sighed, continuing his story.

"I'm just too skinny, and white, and blond. And I hate my ears, they're so pointy. But most of all I hate - "

"Hey, would you stop that? I asked what was bothering you, not to sum up every part of your body!"

"Well maybe I don't like my body!"

Steve had said it more loudly, face stern again looking at Bucky. Bucky was taken by surprise, but understood exactly where he was in the wrong then.

He never thought Steve really * _hated_  his own body this much, he just thought Steve found it a little annoying.

His face must have shown how he felt, because Steve's turned away. Bucky was surprised he hadn't run off yet, and tightened his grip on Steve's waist.

"Listen, for what it's worth. _I_  never thought you were little or skinny or too blond."

He smirked right then, watching the golden locks block part of Steve's vision again.  
Hesitantly he stroked them away.

The touch was unexpected and soft and Steve had to admit, it felt... Nice, in a way.

"'S uhm." Bucky murmured. Steve and him froze for a second, gazing away at each other's eyes.

Steve was the first to break, putting his head on Bucky's shoulder, cheeks a pinky dust.

"'S this okay?" he asked Bucky.

Bucky nodded. When he spoke his voice was low and lazy and had a husky touch at the same time.

"Yeah, 's perfect."

A few minutes of silence passed while they slowed, both taking in each other's presence.

Bucky felt warm against Steve's stomach and legs and waist, all hot spots where Bucky touched him. Steve could probably line them off perfectly.  
Bucky smelled off his cigarette and cologne. It was the one Steve had bought for him recently as a surprise. Bucky liked it and wore it every day. It had become part of his body now.

Steve really liked his body, strong and warm and soft at the same time. Other than the fact that Bucky smelled incredible, he was nice to look at.  _Sometimes too nice_ ,  Steve thought darkly whenever his friend was posing for him to sketch.  
He had a beautiful form and shoudlers and the perfect height for Steve to hide under his arm when necessary.  
And red lips, _God_  those lips. To envy those dames, watch them suck on them, as if they belonged to _them_. They really didn't, but Steve couldn't tell Bucky that. Most of the times he couldn't even tell himself that without having an asthma attack.

Steve sucked in a sharp breath when he heard Bucky's voice near his ear, reassuring and secure.

"I really think you have beautiful eyes. They're blue like the ocean or sky. Can't deny that, right?"

Bucky turned his head so he could reach those baby blues, loving seeing Steve this flustered.

He composed himself quickly and nodded unsurely.

"I suppose?" Deep sigh.  
"It doesn't matter anyway 'cause I don't have the body to make up for it."

Steve was moping again, Bucky could tell.

"Body, body. Who cares? You've got a big heart and a great mind! Don't tell me people can't fall for that. I bet, if you bat those baby's at a dame tonight, she'd dance with you."

Steve laughed and huffed at this, not really knowing how to react. What was he supposed to say to that? Deny it again, like he had a thousend times before?

"Look, Buck. I'm not you. I don't have... Your posture or anything. I'm not as tall as you. Girls like dancing with someone like you, big and strong and handsome. No one will even look at me if you're around."

Bucky chuckled at this, shaking his head. He cocked an eyebrow at a now seriously depressed Steve.

"You don't get it do you Rogers? _I'm_  the one looking at you. _I_ say you're perfect. Let others fuck off to nowhereland! Honestly I don't care, as long as I'm with you. And neither should you."

Steve nodded at this. It was a lot to take in, especially with Bucky's face this close. He decided to let it go for tonight. He was sick of beating himself up over something he couldn't even change!

Defeated, he let his head fall on Bucky's shoulder again, grateful for the grounding effect this had. His fingers had been playing with Bucky's hair on his neck unconsciously, soothing his nerves.

 _Huh,_  he thought. _Bucky never said anything about it._  
  
"Buck?"

"Yes, Steve?"

"Thank you for dancing with me. Even if it is like this."  
He seemed to gesture at Bucky's shoes with his hands, which were still around the soft skin.

"No problem. I like dancing with you, y'know."

Steve huffed at this, not quite believing it.

"Why's that?" he asked, baffled.

"You're so lovingly light to carry around."  
Bucky smirked into his ear, sending shivers down Steve's spine.

"You know what, Buck? Maybe I only need you to dance with me."

He pressed a soft kiss to Bucky's cheek as a thank-you/I-kinda-love-you-you-asshole gesture.

Bucky had been smiling dumbly at the memory for weeks to come.


End file.
